What happens when you bite the head off of two animal crackers and make them play leap frog? Nothing. Quit playing with your food.

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How do you write an anti-joke? With the keyboard Or voice recognition software

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Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

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A American seeking into mexico

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How do you make a priest cry? ... You kill his family

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What do you call a sheep? something to have sex with.

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Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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I have a dirty joke. Yesterday I fell in the mud.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

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Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

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Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

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I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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