Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Released some juice and burst its skin.

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

Person 1: I got a really good knock, knock joke. Person 2: Okay. Person 1: You start. Person 2: Knock, knock. Person 1: Who's there? Person 2: ...

why did the chicken cross the road? it accidentally got out of it's pen. the farmer got very mad at the chicken for getting out, and very vicous-like, yelled at the chicken, causing it to get scared, and run to the other side. and that, is why the chicken crossed the road.

What did the minority say to the white person? Aboobasashagaboogly. He was uneducated, along with the other minorities in the world.

What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete jumped out, who was left? Pete, the boat blew up and instantly killed repeat

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

knock knock Whos there? (the boy who knocked proceeds to run away with laughter)

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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