What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

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What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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