Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

What is the difference between a fridge? I'm sorry, I have a severe mental disability and telling jokes is not... F'tang F'tang Zoop Pong Wii!

What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

tim has no humor

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We are both lawyers.

Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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