what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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cerleb i wrote the one about melons!

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Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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kieran is a homosexual

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What do you call a group of black men stampeding down a hill? Dangerous, so they should slow down!

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Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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Why didn't susie use the jump rope She had no arms, replied carl No, susie doesn't like using jump ropes replies the mother

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

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when i yell your name i probably want your attention :) S.H.

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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Such a statement assumes that life is an actual person, which is impossible. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with what you must do when life hands you lemons.

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knock knock who's there who who who and if u sat something about an owl I'll kick u in the face u fat cike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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