HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

why is it good to be a fireman? because they save lives

i like my woman how i like my coffe... without d i c k s

Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

A small child walks past a man on the street: Fortunately, as the man hates children he is perfect height to let a massive fart rip in his face on the way past. His mum looks disgusted. They carry on with their day.

knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

There once was a man from Nantucket, he was a very nice person and had many friends.

What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

Water? I hardly know her.

Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

Why does everyone love Randy Jackson? Well it's sure not because he's black.

How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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