A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

What's long and black The unemployment line

How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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