What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A bear walks into a bar..... The bartender asks " what do you want?" , he gets killed by the bear because he started talking to it Made by eli

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the homosexual sad? Because his parents kicked him out, it was illegal for him to be married, and he had a difficult time being accepted by the society into which he was born.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do Grant and Lee have in common? They're both black males

thumb_up thumb_down -25

My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yo momma so ugly, except she's not. She's looking beautiful today.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

69

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops