What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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Why was the man killed before he could finish his anti joke? Because he

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62

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A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

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Carlton

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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You're on fire.

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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Women's rights.

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops