How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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who just made fun of katie matt

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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American healthcare.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

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Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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You.

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What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing, the black person was sleeping.

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

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To pen state administraters walk into a butt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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