What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

If life throws you lemons Catch them

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

What's green and wheels? Your mom.

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

Two Jews walk in a bar...

The Bible

Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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