how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

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wanna hear a joke? no

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

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what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

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Women's rights.

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

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What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

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a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

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Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Hoocaust? 3 bee stings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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