Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

What do you call a black man flying a plane ? - a pilot.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

An Asian with a big dick.

My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

Why did the fridge break? Because someone threw a fridge at it.

Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

What do you call someone that has befriended a fisherman? Fishermans friend Moral: Strongest there is.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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