What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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women's rights

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What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

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An old man walks into a grocery store, but doesn't come out. What happened? A plane crashed into the grocery store, killing everyone inside.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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* anti-punchline

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

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man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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What does a chicken get for Christmas? A trip to the processing plant.

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What did the nerd say to the cheerleader? Wouldn't you like to know? Mind your own business.

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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what do u say to a man walking down the street nothing, u shouldnt talk to strangers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops