How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

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What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

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AND

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What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

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a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

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What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

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knock knock go away

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Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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What do you call a mummy that falls into the Nile? Wet

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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George W. Bush

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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