Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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In an all out brawl between the casts of Gilligan's Island, Hogan's Heroes and the Brady Bunch, who would be the winner? The Viewer

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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whats black and yellow and screams? A bus full of black kids going over a cliff.

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whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

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How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

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What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

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How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

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What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am ADD Bird

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What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

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What did one cake say to the other? You wanna piece of me?!?

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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How do you survive the end of the world? You can't- everyone will die!

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What is the difference between a bear and berries? No idea? You better stay out of the forest...

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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