Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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Fill in the _________ Ans: Cup Posted By: Lram

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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Q: What is the difference between a moose and a cow? A: How they're spelled.

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

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And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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I'm Spartacus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the city on the other side. He hoped he could find work in one of the city's cheap factories. He needed money for his family: he could not bear to see them slowly starve for any longer. If he could get a lowly-paid job he may be able to just sustain them. But he knew it could not last for long. He would probably die on the streets or in the slums, cold, lonely and starving. But it was a risk worth taking - he could not see his own family waste slowly away like so many of his friends had.

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

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Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

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David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

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balls in ya mouf

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Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops