What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

Hey! Do you like fishsticks? Me too :)

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

What do you say to a blind man in a sunglasses store? Nothing. Why do you feel the need to bother strangers while you needlessly shop at your local merchandise outlet?

Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

The Jewish boy asks his dad for 50 dollars His dad says " 40 dollars? what do you need 30 dollars for? "

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

:y do people talk? ;idk :oh then nevermind

Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

hi, my name is zack, i have a boner from the girl to my right(;

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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