A horse walks into a bar and asks the bartender "why the long face?" The bartender replies "this is the fourth time this week a horse walked into my bar and every time it happened i have to clean up a bunch of horse pooh!"

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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there was a rich kid strolling in the woods.he saw a bear, HE DIED

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

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whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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What did the barber say to Chewbacca? DAAAAAAYYYYUUUUMMMM!!!

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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Why did the faggot cross the road? Because he was a faggot.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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What do you get when you cross a gay eskimo and a black man? Nothing, as two male humans cannot reproduce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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