What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A boy kills DEER & cooks it & doesn't tell friends what it is. He gives a clue "Its what my girlfriend calls Me!..

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Women deserve equal rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why does the man appear fat he is

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many people does it take to drive a car? 1 person

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats the best way to tell if your wife has been cheating on you with the UPS guy? simply ask her, trust and communication in relationships are vital in their survival and growth.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops