What didn't last long? You in the bed

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: How did the hispanic youth express his irrational fear of snakes when he watched, "Snakes: The Life of These Tranquil Creatures"? A: He screamed and burst into an uncontrollable bout of agitating laughter invoked by his natural uneasiness at having witnessed something very disturbing indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? finding a half worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

JUSTIN BEING SMART

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

tim tebow is a great quarterback

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

little billy has 50 chocolete bars, he eats 45 of them. what does he have now? diabetes, little billy has diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops