What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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What do you call a black pilot? a pilot you racist bastard...

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-Why Peter is going to mall for buying some beer? -Because he was 18 and he was able to do it.

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what rhymes with sloth? rape

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What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

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Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

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Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

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shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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