What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

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What's the difference between an ant and a dinosaur? They are both birds, apart from the ant and the dinosaur

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What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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A woman is carried out of a bar.

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what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Murder his family

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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G:nock nock B:come in!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? This website is terrible. Are you servers from 1990? I hope you all get cancer.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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What did the priest say to the young boy? Hi.

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What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked then proceeded homeward where he murdered his whole family by ax

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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