A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Jesus. Jesus who? You're going to hell.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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You're welcome. On to the next house.

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Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

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Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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What does? 42

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

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What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

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Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

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What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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