How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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What do you call a drunk, blind, deaf monkey driving a car? A bloody good driver!

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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Obama holds the most records for Multikills with Drones. Mu-mu-muuuultiiikilllll.

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

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Iif your reading this ur gay

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Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

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What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

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Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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My friend was driving me home from a party, and was quite drunk. I was relieved that we did not get into a car crash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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