There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

Ben is gay

What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

shabalabadingdong JLR

What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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