3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you get when you cross a rainbow with a unicorn, baby, helmet, a bag of sugar, some watermelons, and a jewish guy's hair? A rainbow unicorn baby helmet with a bag of sugar and some watermelons. and some jewish guy's hair.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats up and also down? your mum

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Since when is it any of your business? Cant we live in a world where chickens can cross the road freely without having there motives questioned?

thumb_up thumb_down

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

thumb_up thumb_down

So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down

There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

thumb_up thumb_down

Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

thumb_up thumb_down

your mum

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

thumb_up thumb_down

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

thumb_up thumb_down

What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red Violets are blue Still the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down

Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops