Knock knock. Who's there. Suidi Arabia. Suida Arabia who? Huh? I was too busy loading my weaponry

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Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

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A Jew man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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A devout Christian dies. Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Fags aren't allowed in Heaven.

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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Q: What did the homeless man say when he was mauled by a bear? A: Ouch.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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whats worst then dieng in a videogame

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Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

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Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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What's big and green and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A snooker table

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What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

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Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops