why did the child fail to make his bed? because he has downs syndrome and he is incapable of participating in everyday activities.

Hey, do you want to play the rape game ? NO! That's the spirit

roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

What was the first thing that went through the mind of the first 9/11 jumper? Thank god I only jumped from the first floor.

whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

Have you tried Ethiopian food? -no -well it's really good

did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

why was smokey bear sad? he got cancer from smokeing

Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

Why didn't susie use the jump rope She had no arms, replied carl No, susie doesn't like using jump ropes replies the mother

why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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