Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

thumb_up thumb_down

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender served him a beer and said "why the long face?", to which the horse replied "neigh". The bartender was later fired for incompetence and serving beer to a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down

You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How did the dog die? He was put down.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mom is so fat..., that she died of a heart attack at an early age and everyone mourned her greatl

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Lil Wayne

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Call of Duty is a good game.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the man say to the other man when he saw a dinosaur look.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops