Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why didn't Suzie go to the park? She commited suicide 2 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

CAOIMHIN. IVE BEEN DOING MY WORK SINCE IVE STARTED THIS CLASS. YOU'VE STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. I WROTE BIG MAC'S AND THATS IT. SO STFU

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why do men not get cullulite? Because it's ugly.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

thumb_up thumb_down -20

My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

thumb_up thumb_down -20

We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call an arab ?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops