What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

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What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

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Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

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my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

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Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Roses are Rose, Violets are Violet.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

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A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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