Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

It's okay, I got the yogurt.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

knock knock go away!!!

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

How do you keep an idiot in suspense?....

If you put two black men in an empty room, what will they do? They will most likely try to figure out why they have been put in such a confusing scenario. Then one of the black men will suggest the possibility that maybe they are being used as a subject of a joke. The other black man agrees then they both hang themselves since they have no other purpose in life.

Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

Sigh, visit me with a pack of condoms, that is so romantic... Now you tell me something, how old are you REALLY and what is your real name? Oh yeah, my first name is Tifa (I know you hate it for some reason), and I am turning 24 in 30 days.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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