what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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I like jokes.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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Why did the little girl cry A rabi slapped her and stole her ice cream

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So this blonde walks into a library.

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A basket full of puppies can do anything, except put out a fire.

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what color is blue? green

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You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

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Women's rights.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

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How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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