Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

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How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

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I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

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WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

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Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

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Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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What do you call an African-American, Latino, Asian, and Canadian all on the same football team? A reasonably diverse group of teammates who are most likely good acquaintances.

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What is worse than being bitten by a snake? Being bitten twice! - Louis

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a chinese man pays the full price

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

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Jokes are dumb. Stories are better. Did you ever hear the story of the blind man who walked into the fish market and said, "Evenin' ladies!"?

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

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what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

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A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

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Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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