What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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45.

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And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

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...and the rabbit says, "How 'bout that schnitzel!"

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

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Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

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Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

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Poop.

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my names jim haha

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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