What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

Q:Which side of a chicken has more feathers? A:The outside.

What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

what happened to the boy who asked for a hit from the bong? he got punched in the face.

why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

Military intelligence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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