What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

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why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

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What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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