What is the diffrents between a Mexican and a elevator? one can raise children the other is a mexican!!!!!

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My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

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Knock knock, Who's there Why did the chicken cross the road? Idiot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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What did one traffic light say to the other? Nothing, as traffic lights are incapable of thought as they are not living.

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

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what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

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Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

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Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

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Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

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What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops