roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

YEAH! LIKE RELLEZ! XD Anyway, sure, it depends, you don't get voted as the most pointless man on Horse-head network without working some for it, but if really weird comments impress you, then sure. Honestly though, I might have been flexing my show off muscles a bit more than usual, as in posting more stupid stuff than usual, BUT, that is because when a MAN meets a sexy WOMAN, yet another one than his WIFE, his already boiling testosterone burns with flames... ...And yeah, where where we again? Oh yeah, you acting a bit bimbo, and me going "RELLEZ" just to make you aware... Then added this.

T u r n i p s

I rated up my joke then opened a new tab went to Anti-Jokes.com and rated it again. Problem antijokes?

Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

Why did the woman drown in the bathtub? Her husband was holding her under.

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

Q: Why did the officer stop the black SUV? A: Because it was going way over the speed limit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

Watch he thinks he can out wit me watch adams next joke it will suck sooooo bad

What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

What do you call a muslim flying an airplane? A pilot.

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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