Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

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Name a country that begins with the letter U A. True B. False C. All of the above D. None of the above

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

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PICKLES

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Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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What's the difference between a duck? An orange.

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Can you spell iCup? I see you pee?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Q. Why did the 40 year old woman puts on a large amount of makeup? A. She may have gerontophobia.

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A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

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What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

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Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

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Why did the Hispanic man have drugs in his pocket? He had just gone to the pharmacy.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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