One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

Wanna hear a joke? No.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

Knock Knock, Come in.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

NEVER

How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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