Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice, and Arianna Grande walk into a bar. They were making a movie.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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Why was Helen Keller depressed? She was deaf and blind.

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Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

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what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

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whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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It got hit by a rocket.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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A mexican and a black were in a cop car. Who was driving it? The Mexican, he was a cop and the black person was his assistant.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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Did you hear the one about the streetlight? It only came on at night.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

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someone jumped off a bridge he died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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