Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

whats worse then being lit on fire? dont worry about that right now your ass is on fire!

45.

What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What did the mountain biker say when he saw a double rainbow? This a very rare occurrence in nature, and I should enjoy this rare phenomenon.

We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

How do you make a salesperson cry? Shoot him in the face and throw him off a cliff

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

There was a mexican and a african in a car, who was driving? The cop, because both of these men are rapists.

Do you want to hear a joke about dogs? A joke about dogs.

what do you do when you see a priest in a bar? tell him that is un richeous and he shall pay for his sins right before you kill him

Hair

This is a joke for Homeless people:

what color is blue? green

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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