What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

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Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

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There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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The Morman Religion.

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Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

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What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

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How did the Jewish man play racquetball? With a racket and a birdie.

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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