Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

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How do you make a snake blink? You can't

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Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

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How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Q: What did the cat say to the dog? A: I hate you, alot

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Racial Equality

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

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Y did the first squarl fall out of the tree? It died Y did the 2nd squarl fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Y did the 3rd squarl fall out of the tree? Peer presure. Why did bobby fall off his bike? He got hit by 3 squarls Y did bobby die? He got run over by a truck:)

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Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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What did the Shark attack victim say just before she died from her injuries? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

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just imagine like a whole mark no imagine like 1000 marks an army of marks ready to conquer

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How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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