Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

Cripples are lame.

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

why did the man move away from me because he thought that i had crabs as pets

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

What do men and women have in common? no really what do they have in common

Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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