What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

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[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

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what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

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Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

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If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

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What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

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What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

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A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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White NBA players.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Pokemon are fictional, therefore Pikachu is fictional, meaning he would never be at a bus station in the real world at all.

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If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

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Why did the door close on little Timmy? He was getting gang raped.

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

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Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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