A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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The EPA.

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

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whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

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Yo mamma so crazy She chloroformed a 4 year old and put her in her trunk and no one has ever heard of her since.

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AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Whats werst than taking candy from a baby. Throwing a baby off a cliff then eating the candy in fronts of its parents

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A muslim walks into a gun shop

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Why is Sophie incapable of Lifeguarding correctly? Because she only has limited use of all of her senses , especially hearing,

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A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

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What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

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Whats funny about a fat person dying? He died while eating friend chicken

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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knock knock who's there ?

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what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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