:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

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Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

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What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

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Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

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He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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anus

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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A boy got a dog for his Birthday. The dog would have said happy Birthday but dogs can't speak.

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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Bob: "Did you eat my sandwich?" Alex: "I am your sandwich."

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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why did the dog went inside the church? because the door was open.

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Society wants to be so prude and pure that on AntiJoke, you actually get words like P U S S Y and P E N I S censored !

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

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Pikachu says "Pikachu!" Squirtle says "Squirtle!" Charmander says "Charmander!" Ash is upset because he cannot communicate with his Pokemon in their foreign tongue.

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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