Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

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What do a fish and a bird have in common? They both live under water. Apart from the bird.

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Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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Guest what? Dog

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got for Christmas? He's his dad. He bought the presents.

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

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whats funny about anti jokes? nothing hince the name ANTI.

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why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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